PROCESS LOG

Losing a friend , but not knowing how to deal

I miss the times we had, I look back and I can’t be sad
But I feel like we both know, that what we have now isn’t what we used to have
Im sorry
For the pain
You caused me
I shouldn’t have let you prey on me
I cried so many tears because of losing u
Never realized you look the same at me
You never called
To ask how I was
You never thought to offer a dinner or night alone
Your world is nothing like mine
You drink and do drugs to pass the time
I told you about a million times
But you never wanted to see
You crossed the line
Im sorry if I can’t deal with you now
The hurt and realizing has caused me too much pain
To deal with it now
You broke my heart
Now I know
It was meant to be broken from the start
Always trust your gut instinct they used to say.

random drawings

B R A I N S T O R M 

PROCESS LOG

Working with textiles

feeling fabrics and frustrations and letting out the ways I have been feeling

sense of reconnecting, mending and fixing something that was broken. the way you mend a piece , is something you feel, you never know what the right or correct way will be. the piece will never be the same and will never be what it was before.
a metaphor for how you can feel in certain relationships. knowing you want to fix the situation, but not knowing how. being broken and wondering if your effort is valid and if u want to save the connection you have with the other person.
every time something breaks, you will try to reconnect but it will never be fixed the same way.

additional drawings and writings

Inspirations

Frida Kahlo ; healing through making , using symbols to show her frustrations within her work

Rogier Roeters ; mending trough humor and child like drawings, using current topics and the scary truth

sense of connection by attachment of certain materials , visualizing it can connect easily , but unfortunately break very quickly as well, representing relationships and the mending within.
you have many ways of mending and reconnecting a relationship, but it's a lot about how you you handle in different situations and how the situation will respond to that.

PROJECT + CONCEPT

Due to certain situations relationships keep changing and evolving. You always keep wondering what happend or could've happend with certain kinds of people. We all take up a space in this world and connecting with others is what makes us feel alive. Sense of connection because you feel the same way about certain topics or know how to laugh together.
\\ But what happens when you lose your connection, because of something that happens or you evolve as a person and realize a certain relationship just isn't for you.
Breaking up a friendship, might need to be mended eventually or in certain situations it might be unmendable.
Its your personal journey that decides how you feel about this connection.
For this project I am researching the space of mending between relationships with others and yourself. And how certain relationships are different from what you expected and might be unmendable in the way you expected.

- Rizvi, Uzma Z. “Decolonization as Care.” Slow Reader ; a Resource for Design Thinking and Practice, 2016.

- Miller, Kei. "The Cartographer Tries to Map a Way to Zion." Carcanet Press Ltd., 2014.

RESOURCES

- Carol Nguyen " No crying at the dinner table"
https://vimeo.com/482032869

- Ahn Zeng " Relationship " installation
https://vimeo.com/87425837

- Rick Darge " Love Language "
https://vimeo.com/552074054

- Frida Kahlo " symbolizing relationships and experiences in her work "
https://artsandculture.google.com/theme/the-elephant-and-the-dove-a-look-at-frida-and-diego’s-relationship/KQKiXi4jN0TeJw

- Alexander Nehamas "Conversations about art and friendships"
https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2016/05/why-friendship-is-like-art/481083/

- 4 stages of friendship
http://static1.squarespace.com/static/53e031b0e4b09fb957e34b32/t/5519dcebe4b0972a561626c8/1427758315232/How+to+make+the+friends+you+always+wanted+.pdf

inspiration video + text